Day 18

All hail the incredible mother-in-law! I've been feeling a like a truck has run over me, and drag myself out of bed each morning achier that the day before. Today my beautiful and gracious mother in law, Sandy, treated me to a 1.5 hour deep tissue massage. It was super intense, and not terribly relaxing, but I felt like I was floating out of that spa. The masseuse kept muttering about how tight my upper back was and would attack each knot with renewed vigor. I'm a little sore, but feel like I've gotten rid of the rocks that were forming in my neck, shoulders and back. Thank you Sandy! xoxoxoxo

Today was a pretty good day. It's a weird spectrum to try and communicate about. Compared to the lives of children in the outside world Tessa's day was kinda rough. But compared to the other kids on the unit here she's a rock star. Her white blood count was 1800 and her ANC (neutraphils) were low 700s. Not high enough to leave the room yet, but soon. It's also confusing to try an communicate with the outside world about her progress. She is doing really well, but mostly because she hasn't succumbed to many of the terrible possible side effects (fever, infection, seizures, etc.). But it can be misleading. She is incredibly fragile and Casey and I are having to turn people away because of exposure to germs. It's hard to grasp how dangerous the outside world can be for her. After my massage I went straight to the shower and bagged up my clothes. The nurses here don't go outside on their breaks because they don't want to bring anything back in to the unit on their clothes. Tessa has to wear a mask when housekeeping cleans the room; she won't be allowed out of her room without one. Even after her new bone marrow kicks in, her cells will have to re-learn their jobs which can take a year or more! She will be susceptible to everything for a long time. It sounds like she's doing so well because every day is a victory. But if you look at the big picture, each victory is a grain of sand on a sandy, sandy beach.

Got some smiles today... Tessa likes to clip the balloons she got on her transplant day to her sippy during the day, or her blood pressure cuff when they're taking her vitals.

Thank you to Tracey for the beautiful pink pillows, which make her bed cozier, pinker and more throne-like! The nurses love Tessa's room because of all the bright cheerful pink decorations!

On a side-note, I just want to take a moment to acknowledge the passing of an amazing woman. My great-aunt Alice passed away today at the age of 96. She was saucy and classy til her last breath and the final chapter of her generation in our family. She was of great importance in my mother's life. Here is a little something she wrote about her aunt...

I want to acknowledge the passing today of my aunt Alice Stamatis at age 96, and the role she played in my life. She taught me to read, to swim and to flirt. This photo was taken Sept. 16, 2012 on my last trip to see her on Cape Cod. She was a feisty, fun, classy and challenging broad, who became VP at ABC because she told them she couldn't type, so they put her in financials. She outlived two husbands (and I thought she might outlive the rest of us). First generation American of Greek parents, she was headstrong, outspoken, loving and brave - I will miss her.

Rest in peace, Alice.